Just As I Am

at 3:47 PM

“Sometimes I feel so guilty about my feelings’’.

“Am I going to hell? That’s the gnawing question that is always drilling little holes in the back of my mind. Please don’t send me to hell....Lord I want to be good...I need your seal of approval” – Bobby Griffith

The statistics of GLBT Youth suicide is significant, especially from Christian backgrounds. “The suicide rate for gay and lesbian youth is up to eight times higher than for their heterosexual peers, often due to homophobic bullying, abuse and anxiety about coming out” (Stark J, 2009).

Many young GLBT people from church backgrounds have previously made attempts at self harm with some even committing suicide. “Recent Australian research found up to 31 per cent of gay people suffered from anxiety disorders and depression compared with between 4 per cent and 14 per cent of heterosexuals. Seventeen per cent of young gay women had tried to harm or kill themselves in the previous six months compared with 2 per cent of straight women” (Stark J, 2009).

In September this year we kick started Freedom 2 b[e] Youth in Sydney to help make a step forward in targeting youth suicide, depression and self harm.

A safe, welcoming space is provided for GLBT youth from Christian church backgrounds. By
Youth, we refer to those under the age of 30. A ‘open’ space is facilitated where there is no agenda, a place free from ‘cruising’ and a space where people can be themselves as they journey on the path of reconciling faith and sexuality, or discovering new beliefs or truths for their lives.

It is important to establish strong networks and connections and give youth the support they need from services we know and trust. Freedom 2 b[e] is not a church, nor is it a counselling / crisis service. It is not our responsibility to provide those services but it is our responsibility to be able to connect youth with those organisations that can. We are currently working on strong networks with ACON, Twenty10, SGLBA, MCC Churches and other Christian churches right around Australia.

However with much support already received...much more is needed. I believe that God is raising up a generation of individuals passionate about life and seeing people equipped with the hope, motivation, resources and love to move forward in every sphere of life.

Keep watching for more exciting information about this new community group. Our latest event was a BBQ and beach day where we provided lunch and drinks for almost 30 gay and lesbian youth and their friends. It was an incredible success and provided a safe space for youth on their journey of reconciliation.

Much love,
Ben Gresham

at 10:56 PM

Hi all,

life is going really well at the moment. I have had my share of challenges and excitement and can't wait to share with you how the last 6 months has been in the life of a gay christian.

NEW POSTS IN COMING WEEKS:
- The Australian Gay Christian Movement
- Jesus in the bedroom (Are gay's different to straights?)
- The links between ex-gay programs and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
- The daily struggle of a gay Christian
- Freedom 2 b[e] Youth: The Reason a place for gay christian youth is needed in our society.

Check out for them on here soon. I will try and post two entries a week and get this blog happening again.

With love,
Ben Gresham

at 1:47 AM

The Hope Alliance will be launching officially in late June this year. We aim to set up a website, an action group and an education team to bring hope to the many indiciduals and their families affected by ex-gay ministries.

Our goals fall under

- Education

- Action

- Awareness

We will work with GLBTIQ organisations and individuals as well as churches and former ex-gay leaders to generate a message of hope for the men and women who are facing spiritual abuse, persecution and descrimination because of their sexual orientation.

The Hope Alliance is a movement, NOT an organisation. We are not tied to any GLBT groups or any church denominations. We are just an alliance of individuals willing to fight injustice in our city, in our churches, in our community.

The HOPE Alliance is establishing itself as an movement that combats the expansion of the ex-gay programs, educating both Christian and secular Australians about the damage they cause.

We believe it is important to give people struggling with their faith and sexuality opportunity to access information and support from various Christian and secular organisations.

We state emphatically that people who are same-sex attracted, queer, homosexual, bisexual and transgendered do not need to try and change their sexual orientation or their sexuality. We also believe that attempts by homosexuals to become opposite-sex attracted are not successful and instead cause a lot of psychological damage and pain.

“You’ve got to give them HOPE” – Harvey Milk

For more information email THA at: thehopealliance@gmail.com

WEBSITE & YOUTUBE CHANNEL COMING MID 2009

"The movement begins with us....individuals standing up for justice, giving hope to others" - Ben Gresham (2009)

LAUNCHING MID 2009

at 7:38 PM

On the 7th March 2009, I marched in my first Mardi Gras with the group Freedom 2 b[e]. For me this was an event surrounded in excitement, fear, anticipation, doubt, love and uncertainty.

Growing up in a predominantly Christian household, Mardi Gras was always seen as an evil, wicked event for the homosexuals. Was told often "it's disgusting" or more commonly "pray for rain so that the devil may not do his work".

And here I was about to march in something that was meant to be 'evil'. I sat there in the marshalling area and it all became too much. Those fears and uncertainties were surrounding me as I questioned whether or not I was doing the right thing. I was in a Tee, shorts and a cap, like many of the other Freedom 2 b[e] group, while many other groups were wearing little more than speedos or undies. I wondered if this is really where a Christian should be....

I gathered a group of about 5 or 6 people together and we just started praying. As we prayed I knew that God's love, strength and hope was with us and at that moment we knew we had to march. We could not pull out. We had to be the light and pour out love to all who were there, showing the gay community that God really does love them.

Marching was an amazing experience. For me, it helped me gain a greater sense of self acceptance and hope as a gay man. It also helped me to understand that even in the midst of uncertainty and fear, God is with us. Jesus holds you and me close and he will never let us go. He is there with open arms to comfort us when we are weak.

As I walked down Oxford Street, I looked around and caught glimpses of people that I knew. Uni friends, school mates and mates from the gay community were there. All cheering me on. Even my parents were watching on TV, cheering for me. I had never felt so liberated in my entire life!!

I also caught the eyes of some people in the crowd that connected with our message. By marching we were being voices for them, giving them hope, showing them that God has never stopped loving them for being gay. Jesus was always there, even though the church may have rejected them.

PLEASE TAKE TIME TO WATCH THE VIDEO BELOW...

27/03/2009 5:02:00 PM

Above: Ron & Ruth Brookman

Source: Fairfax Media, 2009.

Church aims to "change" gays

BY ALICIA WOOD

27/03/2009 5:02:00 PM

A RAMSGATE church has attracted national attention for its programs to guide people out of sexual "brokenness''.

Of most controversy is a program to help homosexuals overcome same-sex attraction.

But director of Living Waters ministries, Ron Brookman, said the controversy was misdirected.

Mr Brookman married his second wife, Ruth, in 1994, and the pair have three children. But he said he can recall being attracted to men from age five.

"I believe homosexuality is a tendency, not a tyranny,'' Mr Brookman said.

After successfully completing the program, Mr Brookman said he had not acted on homosexual impulses.

"I'm so thankful to God, and I want to proclaim his goodness, and give other people hope that change is possible,'' he said.

"The years I was gay were the worst of my life ... This is the happiest time of my life.''

A Sutherland Shire man, 40, who did not wish to be named, completed the Living Waters program and is now married with two children.

He said he was never content with his life as a homosexual man.

"The gay scene is known for its promiscuity and for its lack of commitment. There were days where I had more casual encounters than people have hot meals in a day,'' he said.

"But I dealt with depression, I felt suicidal, because the lifestyle I had conflicted with what I believed in my heart.''

Ben Gresham, 20, went to programs similar to Living Waters. But for him, they did more harm than good.

"I had really bad depression when I realised nothing was changing, and I started to self harm. Then I started to attempt suicide. I thought because I couldn't change, I needed to be punished.''

He was jolted out of his fixation with change when a fellow program member committed suicide.

Lloyd Jones, 24, was encouraged to embrace his homosexuality when his mother came out as a lesbian after experiencing many conversion programs, including Living Waters.

Despite their experiences, both Lloyd and Ben said they believed that people who ran conversion programs were only trying to do good.

STRAIGHT TALK

Living Waters began as part of Exodus International, an inter-denominational Christian organisation founded in 1976.

It came to Australia in 1972 to help homosexuals change their sexual orientation.

Using Christian counselling and prayer, it is a six-month program that encourages people to confess homosexual acts or impulses and pray for healing.

For some time it was offered as a referral service from Hillsong Church, but this is no longer the case.

WANT TO SEE FULL ARTICLE & MAKE A COMMENT?

GO TO: The Leader: 'Church aims to "change" gays'